I was awake too early this morning. Spinning thoughts keeping me from returning to the sleep I longed for.
Dawn didn’t break. It oozed. Weak, gray light sank through my east-facing window as the sun sullenly took the sky.
So different from yesterday. Bright sunlight streamed through the window, nudging me awake like it couldn’t wait to share the day with me. Did I smile at its exuberance?
It was a good morning.
I felt energetic and productive.
This morning all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. Since I couldn’t, I turned to social media on my phone. I know, I know; shame, shame.
Prayer, eh; couldn’t concentrate, any way.
The sun is having as much trouble waking up this morning as I am. As good a my mood started yesterday, it didn’t end that way. By dinnertime I was sad-indecisive, edge-of-tearful, doubtful exhausted. Awoke to overwhelm this dreary morning.
Here’s what I need to remember: It doesn’t matter.
It doesn’t matter how I feel right now.
The world would tell me I should indulge myself to make myself feel better. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the value of Biblical self-care, but that, my friend, isn’t about me running out to get a candy bar (though I may have some chocolate as I finish writing this) or checking out on my family for an afternoon of pampering, or for retail therapy (if money is as tight in your household as it is in mine, you know how counterproductive that would be).
Feelings are just feelings. They change.
The point of this little off-the-cuff Friday post? To remind you that FEELINGS LIE.
When I base decisions on my feelings, my life becomes a disaster. If feelings dictate my reality, I’m lost.
However you feel right now, know that your feelings will change. You won’t always feel good; you won’t always feel bad. Restlessness dissipates; choices have consequences. Sadness lifts. Elation ebbs. Through it all, Truth remains.
Even when we can’t see it, God’s Light shines on our path.
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