Every Christmas there are people experiencing firsts.
Some are celebrated…
Baby’s first Christmas
First Christmas in a new home
First Christmas sober after years of addiction
Others are endured
First Christmas in prison
First Christmas without a job
First Christmas far from loved ones
And many are mourned
First Christmas without…
My parent
My spouse
My child
As Christians, we’re called to rejoice with those who rejoice, and mourn with those who mourn.
I often wonder what that’s supposed to look like. I mean, at any moment, every moment, people are joyously celebrating various things they have accomplished or received, while others’ worlds are caving in. Victories, loss, and tragedy occur every day. The best and the worst of humanity are constantly expressed.
We all know someone who received something they’ve longed for, dreamed of, or didn’t know they wanted until it was theirs this year. We all know someone who lost a loved one this year. We all know someone who is depressed.
Maybe you’re one of those people feeling blessed, bereaved, lost.
How do I rejoice with those who rejoice, and mourn with those who mourn? Click To Tweet
How do I rejoice, or mourn, with you?
Trust God.
It’s easy to question God, to doubt Him in our Why. We can’t see the bigger picture. We can’t see how the drama unfolding around us is part of a story as long as time. If God allows it, there is grace to be found in it.
Accept my identity in Christ.
God made me unique. With a unique purpose. I don’t have to be like you or have what you have. When you are broken, I don’t have to have all the answers to stand with you, or sit with you, in your pain; I can’t fix it, but knowing the One who can is enough.
I don't need all the answers to stand with you in your pain. Click To Tweet
Stop comparing.
Comparison steals joy. When I think what you have is better than what God has given me, I stop feeling blessed. I can’t fully rejoice with you if I’m jealous of you. When you’re broken, I can’t just love you, but have to step back to reframe my view of you.
Comparison steals joy. Click To Tweet
Listen.
Joy can bubble forth in smiling words. Pain and confusion often wish to speak, too; not to receive well-intentioned but incomplete answers, but simply to be heard. Whether you are excited to share good news or weighed down by heavy words that need a place to go, my heart needs to be soft enough to receive them.
My heart needs to be soft enough to receive the words you need to speak. Click To Tweet
Stay.
On my own, I am incomplete and needy; I want what others have that I feel I lack. On my own, others’ pain terrifies me. I run from dealing with things and people I can’t fix. I can’t rejoice with you, or mourn with you, if I turn away.
On my own, your pain terrifies me. God gives me grace to stay. Click To Tweet
Remember.
There are always people celebrating, always people mourning. I’d go crazy if I had to think of each of them, even the ones I know well, all the time. I’m finite. God is not. I need to be willing to be be interrupted.
I need to be willing to be be interrupted. Click To Tweet
Pray.
Whenever God brings someone to mind, or lays them on our heart, we should pray for them. Even if all we have time for is a quick lifting of their name, we should pray for whatever God has for them at the moment to be fruitful.
When they come to mind, pray for them. Click To Tweet
Why?
Happiness loves to see itself reflected in another’s eyes. Pain doesn’t always want to speak; sometimes it needs to just not feel alone.
When I trust God’s sovereignty, love, and grace; when I accept who I am in Him; when I live fully the life and gifts God has given me and appreciate the life and gifts He has given you; when I listen to the exultant or broken cry of your heart… I have the confidence, joy, and peace to be truly present with you. God’s grace can fill me and flow through me to you.
Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
Romans 12:15, NIV
Do you have a devotional Bible reading plan for 2018? Check out Listen When He Speaks, a Scripture reading AND writing plan!
For more about trusting God when life hurts check out the following:
I LOVE this. Today is Mother’s Day and I know it’s a very hard day for many. Your advice is spot on and a good reminder to me that I need to stay cognizant of those around me!!
Thank you, Leah. Depression, anxiety, and my feelings of inadequacy can make it SO HARD for me to see beyond myself and enter into others’ joy or grief. I NEED God’s grace to give grace. Yes, Mother’s Day is hard for many.